A will is a legal document. It decides who inherits what, it goes through probate, and it can take months to have effect.
A letter of instruction is not a legal document and has no legal force. It is the practical companion: the note that tells the people handling your affairs what to do first, where things are, and what you actually want. It is read in week one, while the will is still with the lawyer.
Most people who have a will do not have one of these. It is usually the more immediately useful of the two.
What it is not
Worth being clear, because getting this wrong causes real problems.
It does not replace a will and cannot override one. If your letter says one thing and your will says another, the will governs. Never use a letter of instruction to redirect an inheritance.
It is not legal advice and this post is not either. Rules differ by country and state. If you have anything complicated, talk to an attorney.
It should not contradict anything legal. Keep it operational. Where things are, who to call, what you prefer.
What goes in it
Immediate practical matters
The first 48 hours. Who to call first. Where the important documents physically are. Whether there is a funeral plan or prepaid arrangement. Anyone who must be told quickly, including people your family may not know about, such as colleagues, clients, or a group that depends on you.
The people
Your attorney, accountant, financial advisor, insurance agent, doctor. Names and numbers. Your executor, and confirmation that they know they are your executor.
Also the people who are easy to miss. Old friends, a running group, an online community where your absence would be noticed but nobody knows your family.
Where everything lives
Not the contents, the locations. Where the will is. Where the deeds and titles are. Which bank holds the safe deposit box and where the key is. Which password manager you use and how access is arranged. Where your digital inventory lives, if you made the checklist.
Money in motion
Things that keep happening after you stop. Autopayments, subscriptions, standing transfers, a business that keeps invoicing. What should be cancelled, what must keep running. Anyone who owes you money and anyone you owe.
Digital life
Which accounts matter. What you want done with your social media. Any account where you are the sole administrator of something other people depend on: a family domain, a business email, a shared photo library.
Dependents
Children, and anything a guardian would need to know that a legal document would not contain: routines, medical details, school contacts, what they are afraid of, what comforts them.
Pets. Vet, medications, temperament, and who has agreed to take them. "Agreed" matters. Assumed arrangements fail.
Your wishes
Funeral or memorial preferences if you have them, and permission not to follow them if it becomes impractical. Organ donation. Burial or cremation.
Then the part that is not administrative at all: anything you would want said, and to whom. This is frequently the part families keep.
How to write it
Plain language, short sentences. It will be read by someone who is exhausted.
Lead with the urgent. Put "what to do first" at the top, not on page four.
Say where, not what. "The insurance policy is in the fireproof box in the hall closet" is safe to leave in a drawer. The policy number and your login are not, unless the whole document is protected.
Date it. Undated documents create arguments about which version is current.
Address it to a person. Writing to a specific named reader makes it clearer and warmer than writing to nobody.
Keep it to a few pages. A twenty page letter does not get read in a crisis. If it is getting long, the detail belongs in an appendix or an inventory.
Where to keep it
The recurring problem in this whole area. A letter of instruction is useful in proportion to how findable it is, and dangerous in proportion to how much sensitive detail it holds.
In a drawer or with your will. Simple. Findable. Only safe if you kept credentials out of it.
With your attorney. Safe, and slow to reach in week one, which is exactly when it is needed.
Encrypted, with leave, check-in, and claim. Protected while you can check in. Claimable by the people you name when you cannot hand things over. Which is what HeirVault does, so here is the plain version.
You write the letter as an item in your vault and name who receives it. Your live vault is protected by end-to-end encryption and encrypts in your browser before upload. That means HeirVault stores ciphertext and cannot decrypt your live vault. You check in on a schedule you choose. Miss a check-in and a waiting period starts, with notices to you throughout. Check in and it all stops. If the waiting period passes, the contacts you named can claim what you left them.
Because you name who gets what, you can write different letters for different people. The one for your spouse and the one for your business partner do not need to be the same document, and neither needs to see the other.
Start free or read how it works.
A template to start from
Copy this, fill it in, delete what does not apply.
- To: the person reading this
- Date: when you wrote it
- First things: the three or four things to do in the first days, and who to call
- People to contact: names, numbers, relationships
- Professional contacts: attorney, accountant, advisor, insurer
- Where documents are: will, deeds, policies, identity documents, safe deposit box
- Accounts and access: how to get into the essential ones, or where that information is held
- Money in motion: what to cancel, what must keep running
- Digital accounts: what matters, what you want done with each
- Dependents: children, pets, anyone who relies on you
- Wishes: funeral, memorial, organ donation
- Personal: anything you want said
Then the most important step, which has nothing to do with the document. Tell one person it exists and how they will get it.
This is general information, not legal advice. Rules differ by country and state. Talk to a qualified professional about your own situation.
